


Lethe

by Thal



Series: This Hunting Life [8]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Confused Castiel, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Grumpy Dean Winchester, Memory Loss, Understanding Sam Winchester, Vampires, Witches
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-20
Updated: 2020-01-20
Packaged: 2021-02-25 02:15:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22328305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thal/pseuds/Thal
Summary: The Reader is hit by a witch's curse while bringing down a coven, causing her to lose her memory. She doesn't remember her life as a hunter, or the Winchesters. Will Sam and Dean be able to help her regain her memory? Will Dean lose her?
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Reader, Dean Winchester/You, Dean/You, Dean/reader
Series: This Hunting Life [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/966201
Kudos: 35





	Lethe

**Author's Note:**

> [Y/N] your name  
> [Y/LN] your last name  
> [Y/NN] nickname  
> [E/C] eye color  
> [H/C] hair color  
> [H/L] hair length

“What is wrong with you, [Y/N]?” Dean Winchester shouted at the [H/L], [H/C] haired hunter sitting on the motel bed nursing an injured arm while his younger brother, Sam, huffed and adjusted the strap on her sling. “What the Hell made you think taking the hit was our best option? We talked about this!” His jaw clenched as he paused his rant to take a breath and collect his thoughts, when [Y/N] [Y/LN] sniffled and Dean glanced down to see tears sliding down her cheeks. “Hey. Hey, [Y/NN], c’mon. Don’t do that, sweetheart. You were cursed by a witch, I’m just wor-”  
Dean reached for [Y/N]’s hand only for her to flinch and pull back. Sam stood and glanced at Dean. Dean froze as [Y/N] curled into herself on the bed crying.  
“Uh, [Y/N], you OK?” Sam asked, keeping his voice gentle as he lightly touched her shoulder.  
“Don’t hurt me!” [Y/N] shrieked, raising her good arm to shakily shield her head.  
Sam quickly stepped back, extending one arm to block Dean from trying to reach [Y/N]. “Dude, wait. I don’t think she knows who we are.”  
“What the Hell do you mean?” Dean thundered, turning to Sam, only to be shushed by Sam who gestured to the terrified female hunter who moved up to the head of the bed, trying to make herself as small as possible. Dean exhaled through his nose and turned back to [Y/N]. He sat on the edge of the bad, leaving as much space as possible between them. “Hey, darlin’, you know who we are, right?”  
“No! I swear I don’t!” [Y/N] shook her head fiercely, squeezing her eyes shut. “Please let me go. I won’t go to the cops, I promise!”  
“Son of a bitch!” Dean rose from the bed, muttering. “That curse made her forget us.”  
“Yeah, I think it’s worse than that,” sighed Sam. “I think she’s forgot she’s a hunter.” Sam nudged Dean aside. “I think we need to calm her down and convince her she’s safe with us. You better call Rowena, we’re gonna need a counter curse.”  
“Why me? She likes you better.” Dean grumbled.  
“Because you yelled at [Y/N] and she seems more afraid of you. I hope.” Sam said as he slowly approached the bed, holding his hands with his palms out to show [Y/N] he was harmless as he softly called her name to get her attention. “Hey, [Y/N], I’m Sam, and that’s Dean over there. We aren’t gonna hurt you, we’re here to keep you safe.”  
Dean groaned and stepped out of the motel room to make the call.

\----------

[Y/N] sat quietly in the back of the Impala, warily watching Dean drive. The eldest Winchester’s mood seemed to only worsen as time went on, and [Y/N] did her best to keep her distance from him, gravitating to Sam when she had a question. Dean briefly tried flirting in hopes of reminding her of who she was, but only managed to offend [Y/N]. He quickly backed off, acutely aware that she had no interest in him now.  
“Um, Sam?” [Y/N] timidly called from the back seat. Dean glanced in the rearview mirror so see her [E/C] eyes trained on his brother as she pushed a strand of [H/C] hair behind her ear. [Y/N] chewed her lip.  
Sam turned and grinned at her. “Yeah, [Y/N], what do you need?”  
“H-how much longer ‘til we get to the safehouse?” [Y/N] questioned. Sam had decided to keep the hunting thing from her, opting for a story of needing to protect [Y/N] because she witnessed a crime prior to losing her memory. Dean rolled his eyes, but held his tongue on the issue of calling the bunker a safehouse. “I’m, uh, getting a little hungry.”  
Dean hated how timid [Y/N] sounded now. She was a living shadow of the woman he loved, and it pained him to see her so anxious, and, worse, fearful of him. All he wanted was to hold her and make things right, but she was too wary of him to allow him near her. It pained him, but he refused to torment her to fulfill his own wants.  
“I’d say we’re probably 3 hours out still. So, we may as well stop somewhere to eat.” Sam chuckled as [Y/N]’s stomach rumbled.  
“Yeah, sweetheart, that’s no problem. You still like burgers?” Dean asked, hoping at least somethings were still the same. He tried to catch her gaze in the rearview mirror, but she turned away. Dean felt his heart drop.  
“Hey!” Sam called out to her softly. When [Y/N] turned to face him, he gave her a gentle smile. [Y/N] smiled back. “What ever you want is fine, [Y/N]. Burgers or anything else. It’s your call.”  
Dean sighed when she asked for a burrito, but tried his best to be agreeable about it for her sake. He hoped Sam would go for a beanless burrito, just once.

\----------

[Y/N] sighed as she zoned out to the slow, endless rotations of the ceiling fan overhead as she stretched out on the bed in the sparse room. Sam had given her a quick tour of the basics of the FBI safehouse a couple days ago, but the hallways all looked the same and she had gotten lost a few times trying to get to the kitchen. Thankfully the shared bathroom was just down the hall from the room she was staying in, so she could find that without having to yell for help. Sam would give her a sympathetic smile when he came to her aid, but when Dean had to find her, he was just an eyerolling, mumbling jerk until he could hand her off to his brother. Sam had offered several apologies on Dean’s behalf, but it was not until Sam made Dean apologize for himself that he made any change in his attitude towards [Y/N]. He started offering to help her find places when he saw her in the hall, offered to make her coffee, brought her drinks, and actually said hello to her on occasion. Then today she casually remarked to him that she was relieved he did not hate her the way she had first thought, and Dean swore and stormed out of the bunker leaving Sam to come looking for her and try to piece together what happed through her rambling apology before escorting her back to the room to lay down for a bit before his friend, Rowena, arrived.  
[Y/N] was getting the impression that Sam and Dean were getting frustrated. She certainly was. Living without her memories left her constantly confused. Sam had graciously offered her his laptop the other day to watch movies, but she must have done something wrong as she clicked on something labeled ‘MOVIES’ only to play some pornographic scenario involving well endowed Asian women in cheerleader outfits. She was mortified and had sought out Sam to apologize, not even able to look at him as she offered him the laptop. Sam had been making potpourri in a bowl, a hobby that [Y/N] would not have expected, but did not comment on. Sam looked uncomfortable, muttered something under his breath as he took the laptop. [Y/N] ducked her head and squeaked out another hasty apology and took off down the hall to try to find her room, only to get lost and have to back track. Sam quickly intercepted her, steering her away from his potpourri project, which she attempted to ask about only to have him awkwardly offer her a book from a nearby shelf. Not knowing what else to do, she accepted the book, which now sat on the desk in her room. She found some of the old legends in it interesting, but today was too frustrated to want to resume reading, despite her boredom. She was fairly certain that Sam was upset with Dean’s departure, and, even though she was confused by it, she was sure it was her fault.  
A soft knock at the door pulled [Y/N] from her thoughts, and she got up and made her way to the door. She opened it, surprised to see Dean Winchester standing there.  
“Agent Winchester?” [Y/N] cleared her throat. “I, uh, I want to apologize-“  
“Whoa, darlin’.” Dean stopped her with a wave of his hand. “I’m Dean, remember. None of that agent stuff here.” He smiled at her. “And you got nothin’ to apologize for. But I’m sorry I took off like that on you. You ain’t done nothin’ wrong, I promise.”  
Dean offered [Y/N] a plastic bag with a box in it.  
“Sam told me there was a little trouble with the laptop yesterday. Got you a portable DVD player and some DVDs.” He smirked when she blushed. “Should be safer that way.”  
“Thanks, Dean,” mumbled [Y/N] as she glanced at the titles on the DVD cases. He bought her a romcom, an action flick, a comedy, and a classic horror film. “This will keep me out of your hair for a bit.”  
Dean sighed. “I’m sorry if we…if I’ve made you feel like that, [Y/N]. You’re not in the way. I just feel bad you still don’t got your memories.” He offered her a grin. “We’ll help you get ‘em back. It just might take a little bit, but we got this.”  
“Dean?” [Y/N] chewed her lip. He raised an eyebrow at her. “Until I get my memory back, I want to do something to help out around here.”  
“You don’t got to do that, sweetheart.” Dean tried to shake off her comment about going home, forcing a smile. “But if you’re insisting, maybe we can find something for you to do. If you want, you can help me make dinner.”  
“Sure, I’d be glad to!” [Y/N] beamed at Dean. “Hey, do you have stuff to make pie? I’m kind of craving a slice of cherry pie.”  
“Hell yeah!” Dean grinned broadly. “Sweetheart, I could kiss you!”

\----------

“What about the spell you used for Dean? Rowena, there’s gotta be something we can do for [Y/N].” Sam gestured to Rowena’s thick tome of spells. “Won’t that spell work for her?”  
“No, Samuel, it simply will not.” The red headed witch stared at Sam as the tall hunter shook his head. She gave an exasperated sigh before she began her explanation, her Scottish accent adding emphasis to her words. “The curse that Dean was hit with was different. It was gradually wearing away his memories and his mind. [Y/N] has lost significant past memories. Events, places, people, specialized skills are gone, but her core understanding of simple concepts, basic life skills, what a lamp is are all still present. Where Dean was still forgetting your name after you reminded his, [Y/N] isn’t. She can make new memories and retain them.” Rowena closed the book Sam scowled at, sliding it away from him. She placed a hand on his arm, keeping her voice low. “Your darling friend may not remember her past, but she can still function. This curse is most likely permanent. It was designed to make the victim forget anything that might lead them to pursue or harm the caster. It will erase any knowledge of witchcraft or spells, anything pertinent that one formerly knew. It is merciful, the witch that cast it was not seeking her demise.”  
“[Y/N] wasn’t the target, Dean was. The witch was trying to make Dean forget he was a hunter, so [Y/N] has forgotten everything about hunting. And us.” Sam frowned, glancing towards the hall that lead to the kitchen where Dean was distracting [Y/N] now that Rowena had a chance to examine her, [Y/N] being told that Rowena was a cognitive specialist. “There’s no chance to get her memories back?”  
“I did not say anything of that nature. I merely stated there was no spell to reverse it.” Rowena scoffed. “While it is quite possible that your [Y/N] will not regain her memories, there is a slight chance that something might happen that will cause a past memory to resurface, and, if that happens, her other memories will follow. The memory would need to be significant, not something simple like an old phone number or a family recipe. So there is still a chance.”  
“A chance for what?” Dean strode into the room alone. Sam raised an eyebrow and Dean shrugged. “What? She booted me out of the kitchen.”

\----------

[Y/N] groaned, letting her head fall to her hands as she sat alone at the table in the utilitarian kitchen. Dean had been hovering over her, and she got the feeling Sam asked him to keep her out of the library while he spoke to Dr. Rowena MacLeod. The red headed doctor with the Scottish accent was pleasant to [Y/N] as she observed her and asked questions to test [Y/N]’s memory. Still, [Y/N] was certain the woman did not think it was likely that her memories would be restored. [Y/N] was frustrated. She felt more comfortable around the agents watching her with each passing minute, Sam was certainly kind and supportive, and Dean seemed to be warming up to her, but [Y/N] worried what would happen if she never regained her memories. They would not keep her in the safe house forever, and [Y/N] had no idea what she witnessed or who was a threat to her. She worried how she would be able to keep herself safe when she was no longer in the agents’ custody. She kept her fears to herself, not wishing to add further frustrations to the Winchesters’ case. She glanced at the timer on the table, but the pie still had twenty more minutes to bake. She had to banish Dean for repeatedly sneaking pie filling, although she was sure he was eager to join Sam and Dr. MacLeod.  
“Hello, [Y/N].” A gravely voice sounded behind her causing [Y/N] to gasp and turn her head, her [E/C] eyes wide as her hand flew to her chest. There stood a dark-haired man in a trench coat, his blue eyes fixed on her curiously. “Are you well? You seem…upset.”  
“Uh, I’m fine, I guess.” [Y/N] ventured. “I’m sorry, who are you?”  
“I am Castiel.” Castiel cocked his head slightly to the left as he regarded her. “I am your friend. Have you forgotten?”  
“Yeah, sorry. Castiel. Sorry, I forgot your name,” sighed [Y/N] as her shoulders drooped.  
“Dean asked me to stay with you,” explained Castiel. “Is there anything you need?”  
“I’m going stir crazy in here, I just wish I could get out of here. Just for a little bit.” [Y/N] scowled at the table. “I wouldn’t even care where-“ [Y/N] froze as Castiel removed his hand from her shoulder. She sat on a bench in a park, surrounded by leafy oak trees and a brick lined walking path. [Y/N] blinked twice. “Where…I…what…”  
“You asked to leave the bunker. I thought you would like to sit in a park. Perhaps the beach instead?” Castiel spoke as if nothing were out of the ordinary. “You like the beach.”  
Before [Y/N] could blink, she stood on an isolated sandy beach looking out at the ocean as the breeze pushed wisps of her [H/C] hair into her line of vision. [Y/N] turned to Castiel, eyes wide as she slowly took a couple hesitant steps back.  
“WHO ARE YOU?” [Y/N] shrieked, panic seizing her chest. “SAM! DEAN! HE-“ [Y/N] found herself in the library with the Winchesters and Dr. MacLeod. “HELP!”  
“[Y/N]?” Dean took a step towards [Y/N], and it was enough for her to run towards him as he reached out to her. She crashed into his chest, her arms wrapping around his torso. He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close. “Hey! Hey, easy there, sweetheart! Cas, why is she shaking? What the Hell happened?”  
“No, Dean, he’s dangerous! I don’t think he’s human. Keep him away from me!” [Y/N] shouted, clinging to him, her eyes wild with fear.  
“Damn it, Cas, what did you do?” Dean grumbled, rubbing [Y/N]’s back with one hand and steering her away from the man in the trench coat. He spoke quiet reassurances to [Y/N] as he cast a glance at his brother. “C’mon, [Y/NN], you’re safe here. Cas ain’t gonna hurt you, I swear.”  
“She said she wanted to leave the bunker. I merely accommodated her request.” Castiel explained, tilting his head slightly. “[Y/N] was displeased and not herself. She seemed fearful, so I brought her to you and Sam.”  
“He, I don’t know, it’s crazy, but he like teleported me to a park and then to Florida or something!” [Y/N] exclaimed, finally releasing Dean from her grasp as she moved herself between Dean and Sam, feeling safer with them on either side.  
“Cas, uh, [Y/N] doesn’t know who you are,” explained Sam. “She lost her memory.”  
“I am Castiel, angel of the Lord.” Castiel fixed his gaze on [Y/N]. “I am an angel.” He raised and arm to gesture to Rowena. “That is Rowena. She is a witch. I presume she is here to assist you.” He gestured to Sam then Dean. “And Sam and Dean Winchester are hunters, like you.”  
Dean groaned. “OK, I’m going to handle this now, since Cas just blew the FBI story we had going.” He offered [Y/N] his hand as she looked at the others warily. “[Y/N], you’re safe here, that’s a promise. No one is gonna hurt you. But, uh, we’ve got a lot to explain. I know it sounds crazy, but Cas is right about us.” He sighed. “Look, let me show you something, it might help you understand what’s goin’ on here.” Dean took a slow step towards [Y/N]. When she did not attempt to shy away, Dean closed the gap, still offering her his hand. “Please, just let me show you.”  
[Y/N] hesitated, warily eyeing Castiel and Rowena before glancing toward Sam. Sam gave her a small nod with an apologetic smile. [Y/N] turned back to Dean, then gave a barely perceptible nod as she accepted his hand. “OK.”

\----------

[Y/N] wandered around the room, randomly inspecting different things and running her fingers lightly over the furniture and walls. Nothing had sparked any sense of familiarity, but she was comforted by the knowledge that the things in here were hers. It gave her a sense of belonging that was missing before.  
“[Y/NN]?” Dean held out a photo frame to her. “You, uh, might want to see this.”  
[Y/N] accepted the frame silently, gazing down at the photograph of her and Dean sitting on the hood of a classic black Impala, both of them smiling, Dean’s arm around her waist.  
“We’re…we used to be close.” Dean said quietly. “You’re important to me. To all of us. You hunt monsters with us. You used to. There was no crime, we ain’t really FBI. The bunker is kinda like a safehouse. You were hit by a curse from a witch.” Dean sighed. “Rowena’s OK, for a witch. Cas is your friend, he won’t hurt you.” Dean moved beside her. “Don’t wanna throw too much at you at once, but any questions you got, I’ll answer ‘em. As you come up with ‘em, OK?”  
“Dean?” [Y/N] started, unsure. “What do you mean by, uh, monsters?”

\----------

“You know, [Y/N], if you’re getting tired of me kicking your butt all the time, you can quit any time.” Dean gave [Y/N] a cocky grin, already anticipating her angered swing, which he easily dodged before jabbing at her ribs with his boxing glove. “You look exhausted.”  
“Not a chance, Winchester.” [Y/N] grumbled, staggering backward and recentering her stance. “I need to get back at it eventually. You won’t let me hunt until I’m fully trained, I ain’t wasting anymore time!”  
Dean frowned. “[Y/N] you lost your memory. You have to relearn years of training, you ain’t gonna’ be ready for hunting overnight. You gotta give this some time.” He started removing his boxing gloves. “You’re done for today.”  
“No, I’m not. Let’s go again!” [Y/N] challenged raising her gloved hands.  
“No, [Y/N].” Dean firmly reprimanded. “We’ve been at this for two hours, we’re done for the day.”  
“Fine! I’ll just go research with Sam.” [Y/N] began to untie the lacings of her boxing gloves with sharp yanks, creating a knot in one. She swore under her breath.  
“[Y/NN], stop!” Dean grabbed her glove, lightly pulling her other hand away. “Let me.” He began loosening the knot. “And you’re not going to help Sammy either. You’re done.”  
Dean removed her glove and [Y/N] stepped back, her [E/C] eyes narrowing at him.  
“Like Hell I’m done.” [Y/N] advanced on Dean. “You can’t bench me forever. I can just leave and do this on my own.”  
“[Y/N], stop being so dramatic. I’m forcing you to take a break, not benching you. You’re pushing yourself too hard, and you have been for weeks now.” Dean took her hands in his. “You need to rest, just for the next two days. Then we’ll get right back to your training, OK?”  
“No, it’s not OK, Dean!” [Y/N] yelled, her cheeks reddening in her frustration. “You don’t need this, but I do. It’s not fair, it’s my life, not yours!”  
“Why are you being like this?” Dean yelled back.  
“Because I need to hunt to get my memory back!” [Y/N] shouted, tears welling up in her eyes. “I am sick of not knowing who I was. Maybe if I go hunting it will remind me of something, I gotta try.”  
“I understand –“ Dean started only to stop when [Y/N] scoffed bitterly.  
“No, you don’t understand, Dean. You were losing your memory for a couple days.” [Y/N] glared at him, her hands clenched in fists as tears began to roll down her cheeks. “It’s been three and a half freakin’ weeks! You have no idea what this is like!”  
[Y/N] spun on her heel and stormed out of the sparring ring. Dean sighed, running a hand over his eyes. At least this was familiar territory for him.  
Dean followed [Y/N]’s retreat down the hall until he reached her room. He knocked on her door. Ignoring her muffled demand for him to go away, Dean opened the door. [Y/N] lay face down on the bed, her face hidden in her pillow. By the shaking of [Y/N]’s shoulders, Dean knew she was crying her frustrations out.  
“I’m sorry, [Y/N], but I gotta put my foot down.” Dean sat on the end of [Y/N]’s bed, resting on hand on the back of her calf. “I know you’re frustrated by this, sweetheart, I do, but exhausting yourself isn’t helping, either. Look, me and Sam, Cas, too, we’ll tell you stories and stuff to help you. Share our memories, give you an idea of who you were before. I know it ain’t the same, but it’s all we can do.” Dean absent mindedly rubbed her leg. “We ain’t gonna stop ‘til you get your memory back. Something familiar will happen, then you’ll be good again. Until then, sweetheart, you gotta remember to take some down time. Please?”  
“What if it doesn’t work?” [Y/N]’s teary voice was a bit muffled by the pillow, but Dean still heard her question. “What if I’m stuck like this?”  
“Nothin’ is gonna change, [Y/NN]. There’s always a place for you here.” Dean softened. “Even if you don’t get your memory back, you’re always gonna have me and Sammy here for you. And you can make new memories. But we’ll keep tryin’. That’s a promise, sweetheart.”  
[Y/N] sat up, her [E/C] eyes downcast. “Why are you doing this, Dean? You know I don’t have those feelings for you. Not without my memories.”  
“Hey, this isn’t about that.” Dean gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. “I can probably win you over with enough time, but if not, you’re still my friend. I just want to help you. You don’t owe me nothing’, got it?”  
“Yeah, yeah.” [Y/N] wiped her eyes with her fingers. “You’re cocky, you know that?”  
“Just part of my charm, sweetheart!” Dean stood and offered a hand to [Y/N]. “Let’s go for a drive and grab some burgers or somethin’.”

\----------

[Y/N] dozed in the back seat of the Impala, Dean’s jacket draped over her torso like a blanket, as they drove down the deserted night road, winding through the back roads of Wisconsin after a successful salt and burn. It had been two months and [Y/N] still had not regained her memories. She was slowly losing hope, they all were, but Dean still tried to keep her hopes up. Dean still made sure to recount several anecdotes a day from their time together, but nothing felt familiar to [Y/N].  
“She out?” Dean asked, his tone hushed as he watched the road.  
“Probably.” Sam glanced over his shoulder and nodded. “Yeah, she’s sleeping pretty good back there.” He pushed a hand through his shaggy hair, and exhaled audibly from his nose, glancing sideways at Dean. “Hey, uh, how’s it going with her?”  
“Still no memories. She’s keeps asking me to tell her the, uh, bad memories. Thinks they’ll be more emotional and maybe more likely to make her remember.” Dean sighed, casting a quick glance to the rearview mirror. “She’s giving up, Sam. I hate it. Nothing’s workin’ for her. I keep trying’, but nothing is happening.”  
“Sorry, man.” Sam shook his head. “Is she warming up to you again?” He caught the look Dean cast his way and chuckled. “What? It’s kinda obvious, you keep doting on her and bringing her snacks and stuff.” He grinned. “Oh, and the excuses to spend time alone with her? You’re pretty obvious, dude.”  
“Shut up! I’m smooth and awesome,” snapped Dean, trying to suppress a laugh. “Bitch.”  
“Jerk.” Sam cast a glare at Dean before laughing. “You got another it’s-not-a-date night planned?”  
“Yeah. [Y/N] was wanting to go to that themed escape room thing in town. You know, before.” Dean sighed. “Thought we’d give that a try tomorrow night.”  
“Dean, you’ll get her to come back to you.” Sam glanced back at the sleeping woman in the back. “I see her watching you. She cares, she does.”  
“I know.” Dean chuckled. “She got on me for getting’ down on myself the other day. Remember when we took that break from each other and she almost died when we helped those friends of hers take down that coven? Yeah. I kinda said I didn’t deserve her then…she got pissed and told me how amazing I was, and that she didn’t need her memories from before, ‘cause she could see it every time we went to take down a monster.” Dean shook his head. “I almost kissed her. I wanted to, but she’s not at that point yet, so…yeah, no kiss.”  
“At least she’s still in there.” Sam chuckled.  
“Yeah, she’s still in there,” agreed Dean. “I tell her that, anytime she acts like her old self. She’s there more and more, even if her memory ain’t. I think she’s worried I’ll lose interest if she never remembers us before. Like she’s not the same person without her memory. I keep telling her that isn’t important, but I see her old self in her personality. Especially when we fight, although I ain’t saying that to her again. She didn’t like that one.”  
“Yeah, that sounds like [Y/N].” Sam laughed, quickly stopping himself when [Y/N] let out a soft snore behind him. “So does that!”

\----------

“Dean?” [Y/N] ventured, pushing a strand of [H/C] behind her ear as she sat beside him in the Impala. He was taking her out for dinner at a place she’d mentioned to him earlier in the week. Dean wore jeans and his FBI dress shirt and tie, and she wore a low-cut black dress that made Dean give a low appreciate whistle when she emerged from her room. Dean glanced at her. “I…uh…I like spending time with you like this.”  
“Yeah, well I like hanging out with you, too, [Y/NN].” Dean grinned at her as he turned into the restaurant’s parking lot. He maneuvered the car into an empty parking space. He paused, then took her hand in his and place a gentle kiss to the back of her hand. “It’s nice to get out of the bunker, just you and me.”  
“Yeah.” [Y/N] blushed. “Yeah, it is.” She fiddled with the fabric of her dress, biting on her lower lip. “I…why is this so hard?”  
“What do you mean, sweetheart?” Concern furrowed Dean’s brow. “Did I say something wrong?”  
“No, it’s not that! I just…” [Y/N] dropped her eyes to her lap. “I just…well, I want to tell you…I feel…well…no, I’m making it weird now.”  
“Hey.” Dean place one hand lightly on [Y/N]’s shoulder. He gave her an awkward smile, then licked his lips. “Can I…can I try something?”  
[Y/N] slowly nodded.  
“OK. Here goes.” Dean licked his lips once more then leaned towards [Y/N], reaching a hand out to cup her cheek. He closed the space between them, bringing his lips to hers in a gentle kiss. He pulled slightly back, his bright green eyes staring into her [E/C] ones. “Was that OK? Wanna go for another?”  
[Y/N] brought her lips to Dean’s, her kiss more needy. Dean smiled into the kiss, bringing a hand to the back of her neck as he reciprocated with his lips. They slowly separated, grinning at each other.  
“Was it good for you?” [Y/N] batted her eyes playfully.  
Dean laughed and pulled [Y/N] into a tight hug.

\----------

[Y/N] scowled out the window as Sam and Dean argued a few yards away from the Impala. She had gone against Dean’s order to stay back, and a vampire grabbed her, dislocating her shoulder when he threw her into a bookcase, and nearly took her out. Sam was able to pull it off her before it tried to drain her and Dean wasted no time in decapitating it. Dean looked furious and Sam was quick to get [Y/N] situated in the Impala so he could try to run interference with Dean. She could hear Sam urging Dean to calm down, and Dean going off on Sam about her risk taking. [Y/N] tried to fashion a sling out of her bloodied denim shirt to alleviate the pain in her shoulder. When she glanced back out the window she saw Dean storming off and Sam approaching the Impala to open the driver’s side door.  
“Sam?” [Y/N] questioned.  
“Dean’s gonna cool off. We’re gonna head back to the bunker. Dean will call when he’s ready for me to pick him up.” Sam cleared his throat making [Y/N] meet his hazel eyes in the rearview mirror. “I get it’s hard dealing with Dean when he’s like this. But you gave us a scare. You should have stayed back. I get you were watching our backs, but you weren’t ready for a nest of vampires.” Sam turned to her. “I’m with Dean on this, you put yourself in danger unnecessarily. He’s right to be pissed. We both are…but I get that you wanted us to be safe, too.”  
“I’m sorry, Sam.” [Y/N] sighed. “But why did all the risk have to be on you two? I’m just as capable, aren’t I?”  
“Wow.” Sam chuckled. “We’ve done this before. And you said the same thing, then too.” Sam smiled at [Y/N]. “Look, I get you wanted to protect us and it was pretty much on instinct. I just hate seeing you in that kind of danger. You and I are good, but you still gotta deal with Dean. It’s gonna suck, but he’s got a right to be heard.”  
“I know.” [Y/N] sulked in the back seat, not looking forward to the impending argument. “Hey, Sam, you think we could pick up some pie on the way back? Dean might forgive me faster with pie.”

\----------

[Y/N] ran from the library in tears, ignoring Dean yelling for her to stop. She heard enough of his tirade about her recklessness and irresponsibility. He would not pause long enough to hear her apology, pulling her off future hunts, and refusing to continue with her training until she got her head on straight, but it was him going off about her “stupid risks and damned stubbornness” that brought tears to her eyes. She was quick to turn away and declare she was no longer their problem as she rushed out of the room. [Y/N] was not going to give Dean the satisfaction of seeing her tears, lest he claim she was to weak willed to hunt, so she hastened down the corridor.  
Heavy foot falls behind her and a firm hand on her arm stopped her. Dean turned her to face him. His eyes softened as he watched a tear roll down her cheek. He shook his head slowly, then wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug.  
“I’m sorry,” the hunter mumbled into her hair. “I crossed the line. I just can’t get the image of you pinned down by that vamp out of my head…I was scared I was gonna lose you, [Y/NN].” Dean dropped a kiss on the crown of her head before stepping back. “I said stuff I didn’t mean, and I know you didn’t go in there to piss me off. I know that. I just need you to be safe.” He ran his hands lightly up and down her arms as she nodded silently.  
“I’m sorry, too, Dean.” [Y/N] sniffled, abruptly swiping at her tears with her hand. “I wasn’t thinking and just kinda reacted automatically to get between you and that vampire. It wasn’t my best idea.”  
“[Y/NN] you’re everything to me, it hurts me to think of losing you on a hunt. That’s why I got so angry.” Dean offered her an apologetic smile. “But it would kill me inside if I lost you because of me. Please don’t go, and I promise I’ll make it up to you.”  
“I’m not go-“ [Y/N]’s [E/C] eyes grew wide and she clutched Dean’s arm in a panic. “Something’s wrong…“  
The room began to spin violently and [Y/N] felt nauseous. Everything became blurry as if everything before her eyes was nothing more than moving swirls of paint. Her ears were ringing loudly and she felt like she was falling. In the distance she could hear Dean calling her name, then yelling for Sam. The ringing intensified until she could hear no more and then her world went dark.

\----------

The images were flashing so quickly that at first [Y/N] did not understand what she was seeing, then they slowed. A sense of familiarity filled her, followed by an overwhelming cascade of emotions, both pleasant and painful. The ringing in her ears was beginning to soften and [Y/N] was filed with extreme sadness and began sobbing uncontrollably.  
In the distance, Sam and Dean’s voices were calling to her, growing louder until a warm, gentle caress touched her cheek. A wave of dizziness washed over her, then ebbed, and the rush of images vanished.  
[Y/N] blinked. She lay in a bed in the infirmary, covered by a thin sheet. Sam stood on one side of the bed, watching her with wide eyes. Dean sat on the other side, one hand lightly cupping her cheek.  
“Thank God,” Dean exhaled, then shook his head. His face relaxed in relief as he ran his thumb gently along [Y/N]’s cheek. “What happened…” [Y/N] lunged forward, throwing her arms around Dean. He caught her, holding her close as her hands grabbed fistfuls of his flannel shirt. He rubbed circles on her back as he kissed her temple. “You OK, [Y/NN]?”  
“I’m OK, Dean. I’m better than OK.” She gave him another squeeze then slowly pulled back. “I got my memory back!”  
“What were you two doing before [Y/N] collapsed?” Sam asked.  
“I was apologizing for being a dick to [Y/N],” Dean confessed. “Then she fainted.”  
“Why did that fix her memory?” Sam’s brow furrowed as he puzzled over it.  
“It fixed me, because it was how Dean and I first got together, remember?” [Y/N] laughed. “We were arguing about me being stupid, Dean wasn’t listening to me, I threatened to leave and stormed off. Then Dean came and apologized, and a certain someone,” [Y/N] winked at Sam, “interrupted and spilled the beans about me liking Dean. Pretty much our standard argument pattern, minus that last part. Whenever it’s actually my fault, and Dean blows up at me, he comes around and reminds me he still cares.”  
“So, you got your memory back because I was a dick?” Dean’s shoulders slumped.  
“No! Dean it was the apology that fixed my memory.” [Y/N] kissed his cheek. “It wasn’t the fight, but that did build in to the memory. But it was how we fixed things that did it.”  
“You two are so dysfunctional.” Sam groaned and rolled his eyes. He placed a chaste kiss to [Y/N]’s temple and turned to leave the infirmary, calling to them over his shoulder. “At least you make it work for you.”  
“Where’re you going’, Sammy?” Dean called out.  
“I’m gonna get us a pizza.” Sam’s voice came through the corridor. “Because I know how you both are, and I don’t need to be around while you guys make up for lost time!”

**Author's Note:**

> This one's a little longer than most of my stuff. It wasn't a planned story either, I literally woke up on Thursday morning, and just had to start writing this one. So, there you go.


End file.
